Cyber Scum

I’ve encountered various people through the years, both offline and online, and have been amazed by the sheer diversity of the species. But what interested me the most were the reclusive online acquaintances, who spend tremendous hours in front of a computer assuming their online alter egos. Some of them I’ve met personally, and let me say that most of them were shy, but you can tell that they were very smart and really had a lot to say (if given a chance). I guess that’s why blogs, and forums are very popular these days, especially among cyber conscious crowd. It gives them the power to say (others preach) what they otherwise can’t in person. This used to be reserved to people in power, the media, and activists. Well technology has changed all of that, making a seemingly average person the ability to practice what we usually take for granted, Freedom to Speak. And speak-out we all did. All of this is well and good, but the phenomenon has also created a sub-species (make that two) that has generally spoiled the cyber culture. These same cretins already existed before, but has found their way to the domains of cyberspace, and as much as I loathe them (and I’m sure some others do as well), they’re here to stay, and there’s nothing much we can do. So who are these pests? I present to you the obnoxious Fanboys and the arrogant Elitists. Lets break them down, shall we?

Lets start with the ever-annoying Fanboy. You’ve met at least one throughout your lifetime. They were already annoying before, but the power of the web has transformed these slugs into total nutcases. You see them usually in their natural habitat, The Forums. My favorite forum to hunt for Fanboys is through Video Games Forums. While others simply seek cheats and walkthroughs, these Fanboys do nothing but brag about their favorite Game Console, their favorite Game Creator, their favorite this and that. At the same time, they will flame anyone who has a different preference. This usually resorts to Fanboy vs. Fanboy word wars, and as annoying as they are, you can’t help but feel amused by how ridiculous they all are. A sample word war could involve something as simple as “my avatar is better than yours.” But what really heats up a discussion is Game Consoles, “X-box is way cooler than your Piss-S2”, or “Nintendo has got the best games, X-box is crap.” They’re like moronic sports fans that obsess about their respective teams, while insulting the rivals, and for what? So they can have some credence, or a sorry claim for dominance? I’m sorry dude, you’re just plain lame.

Moving on, we now talk about the oppressive Elitists. They are similar in some ways to a Fanboy, including their fervent, fanatical preference for a single brand or product. But what differentiates these snobs from the scums, is that most generally belong to the upper-classy. They prefer to acquire certain products, not because their better or easier to use, but because their expensive and they can afford it. An example of this can be found in Mac Forums, were they bash Windows users, and build shrines for Steve Jobs. Being a Mac user myself, I got caught up in that shit as well, during my newbie days. But the more I got involved, the more I realized how arrogant, and ridiculous it all was. You use a Mac because the OS is stable, and the GUI is easy on the eyes, but when you start buying Macs simply because it makes you look cool when you hangout in Starbucks is just plain sad. The Elitists are people who like to trend-set and showcase expensive toys just because they can, will punish those who can’t with sly remarks, or outright insults. They like to pretend they know everything, and bask in the glory of feeling important. Like the Fanboys, Elitists are all screaming for attention however way you view it.

Well there you have it, the joy-suckers of the online world, one just as sad as the other. Some people can live with them, others can’t stand them, but you have to admit, it all adds spice to an already tasteful experience on the web. If you happen to know or meet one of them, do as I do… ignore them, and just mind your own business, let the others swat them away.